The Blog of P.U.R.E. and Sue Scheff

Why Parents should set up clear Boundaries for their Kids By Kara Tamanini If you ask almost any child if they need boundaries, they are of course going to say, "I don’t need no rules". Of course, nobody wants to follow rules, almost everyone wants to tell others what to do but at the same time they don’t want to be told what to do. Most people want to do what they want to do and when they want to do it. So why should we set up boundaries for our kids. Parenting children is not simply about how and what you are doing for them right now, it is really about developing their character in order for them to be successful adults that are able to have boundaries with others and be able to develop healthy relationships into the future. As parents, we are completely aware that children have to be taught how to do everything and this includes how to act and behave. A boundary is like an imaginary line that defines a person of where they are and how they relate to those around them. C...

Dr. Selznick has written a book, The Shut-Down Learner , which can help many parents that are struggling academically with their kids that are underachieving may benefit from. Is there more to their lack of motivation? Here is a recent article by Dr. Selznick. We Keep Telling Him - “You've got to be organized. You've got to be organized!” By: Richard Selznick, Ph .D . Fifth grader, Matthew, is making his family crazy. The nightly ritual of "What do you have for homework?" "Did you hand in your work?" "When are you going to get started on your homework," is taking its toll on the family. Matthew's mother is particularly frazzled. With Matthew being the oldest of three children, he is putting tremendous strain on her. Not only does Matthew have a problem handing in his home work, and writing down his assignments, once Matthew gets started, it takes him incredibly long to finish. The other night, for example, it took Matthew between three and four...

TeenHealth provides some great tips for this upcoming holiday weekend! Fireworks: Handle With Care Fireworks safety starts before a firework is even sold: It begins with the manufacturers, who need to follow strict quality controls in making their products. That doesn't mean every firework is guaranteed to be safe, though. Things can go wrong with fireworks, just as they can with any product, and most of the time it's because the fireworks aren't handled properly. That's the reason you see all those warnings on fireworks. Thousands of people are taken to hospital emergency rooms in the United States every year because of injuries from fireworks — including bottle rockets, sparklers, and firecrackers. The most common fireworks injuries involve the hands, fingers, eyes, head, and face. Some of these injuries are severe, resulting in permanent health problems such as missing fingers and limbs and vision loss . So what can you do to enjoy the Fourth of July and still stay ...

Did your child/teen struggle this past year in school? Are they taking summer classes? Consider enhancing their study and homework skills with Cramster.com . Homework Help for High School and College Students Cramster is the leading online study community that offers homework help for math, science, engineering, and business classes by providing resources to accelerate and strengthen the learning process. The community is made up of high school and college students, educators, parents, and subject enthusiasts with the common goal of sharing information and helping students excel in their classes. Study Guides and Practice Tests The math, science, and engineering study guides on Cramster help students understand how to solve problems by providing practice tests, practice problems, and customized quizzes. If a student needs additional help, they can post questions on the question and answer forums (called Q&A boards) and the Cramster community will come to the rescue. The Q&A boa...

It has been a week of tremendous loss in Hollywood and in many hearts of people throughout the world . This grief is effecting all ages, from kids that have been mesmerized by the music of an ICON to adults that grew up with that ICON -the shock and sudden death of anyone you have grew up with, looked up to, or simply had become part of "your" life can be devastating. I found an article from Education.com that offers some great advice on handling grief within your family. Helping / Supporting Someone Who Is Grieving by Jeanne Segal , PhD Jaelline Jaffe , Ph.D.Linda Laucella Source: Helpguide Bereavement can be a lonely and frightening experience for many people. Once the funeral is over and the cards and flowers stop pouring in, they still need caring and support. It is not uncommon for people to have difficulty openly expressing their feelings around grief and sadness. This may be particularly true when the public outlets for their pain and sorrow have ended. Where do peop...

As a Parent Advocate , this article is a very important for parents with teens and tweens that you suspect may be using drugs. Summer is here, many kids have extra time on their hands, and experimentation can be common. Learn some warning signs and parenting insights. Teenage Depression and Drug Abuse by Partnership Editorial Staff Teenage depression and drug addiction are often linked, but new advances in science may be able to help treat both. By Joanne Nicholas for Partnership for a Drug Free America “There’s ample evidence that many children use drugs to self-medicate for depression, not to mention a host of mental-health disorders. The drugs they take may become the focal point for both kids and their parents, but they may be masking deeper problems. How can a parent know? Many symptoms of these disorders appear to be identical to some of the symptoms of drug abuse. Also, by the time experts finally figure out there’s a problem, drug addiction may have exacerbated the underlyin...

Source: Parenting Toolbox Having an ADHD child often means MESS for mom and dad. Here’s some great tips and tools for keeping them slightly more organized: 1. Give specific instructions. “Put away the toys on your carpet on the shelf in the closet.” Be consistent — if the toys are stored on the shelf one night, they should be put there every night. Children need to know precisely what you expect. 2. Assign tasks that your child is capable of doing on his own. Success builds confidence. The goal is to teach your child to do things independently. 3. Involve your child in discussions about rules and routines. It will help him understand goals and teach him to accept responsibility. 4. Write down routines as sequences of tasks (two to five items only), and post where easily visible (refrigerator, bathroom mirror). Review lists regularly with your child. 5. Be realistic about time. Make sure you’ve set aside enough time for the child to complete his homework, clear the dishes, and get out t...

As a mother and grandmother, I am very fortunate my kids are not hooked online - maybe it is because the horrible ordeal I went through or maybe it is because they have other activities that doesn't give them extra time to surf online. Either way, I am silently grateful. I know the Internet can be an educational tool, but at the same time it can be a harmful, hurtful and potentially dangerous space - what is lurking online? Most everyone from every walk of life. Be an educated parent. Mothers Against Predators: Every time our children log on to the world wide web, they expose themselves to a world of strangers. Hidden among those strangers are predators who navigate the cyber world with ease. They exploit social networking sites to find our kids. They have even formed their own online networks, trading tips on how to reach our children. We must respond. Together we can reduce the odds that another child is hurt. Please join our fight against those who prey on our children. ...

REMINDER FOR TOMORROW – JUNE 24TH – IMPORTANT SUMMIT REGARDING TEENS AND CYBER-SAFETY. COX’S NEW SURVEY ON CYBER-SAFETY FINDS MANY TEENS GOING ONLINE WIRELESSLY WITHOUT LIMITS OR CONTROLS Children’s Advocate John Walsh to Lead Teens in Discussion of Cyberbullying, Sexting and Other Cyber-Safety Risks at Cox’s Annual National Teen Summit on Internet Safety ATLANTA – For the fifth consecutive year, Cox Communications, in partnership with the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children® (NCMEC) and America’s Most Wanted host and children’s advocate John Walsh, will present the results of a new survey on the behavior of young people online. This year, the survey also looks at teen behavior using wireless devices. Under the auspices of Cox’s Take Charge! program, the partners are helping parents understand the potential dangers of the Internet and learn ways they can help keep their kids safer online. The initiative includes both the survey about teen behavior and a frank discussi...

Kara Tamanini is an author and therapist specializing in adolescents. One of her recent articles about Teenage Mutilation is an excellent resource for parents to better understand this behavior. Why Teenagers/Young Adults Self-Mutilate (A therapist’s perspective) First and foremost, most teenagers and young adults are not attempting suicide. The act of self-mutilation is rarely about taking one’s own life. However, some young adults have killed themselves by accident when they took the act of self-mutilation too far. The difficulty often faced in self-injurious behaviors such as cutting, burning oneself, or ripping/tearing at one’s own skin, is that the mutilation becomes addicting and is very difficult to all of a sudden stop. Mostly, in my experience I have seen young adolescent girls age ranges 11-12 years to 17-18 years old, however I have also seen teenager boys indulge in self-injurious behaviors as well as young and middle-aged adults. The one factor that I have seen that is con...

Sarah Maria is a body image expert and has an exciting new book coming out, Love Your Body, Love Your Life . Take a moment to visit her website at http://www.breakfreebeauty.com/ and learn more about overcoming eating disorders and empowering your life and the life of your teenager. Body Image in Teens By Sarah Maria If you're in high school, most of your friends are probably on a diet. A recent study shows that 90% of junior and senior girls are on a diet regularly, even though only 10-15% are actually overweight. The modeling industry also promotes the idea that you need to diet and exercise religiously. Fashion models are actually thinner than 98% of American women. An average woman stands 5'4" tall and weighs about 140 lbs, while the average fashion model is a towering 5'11" tall and weighs under 117 lbs. In reality no amount of dieting, exercise and discipline can earn you a magazine cover-ready body because those photos have been Photo Shopped, doctored an...

Wow, Danielle Herb (check out her video) offers an amazing program for kids with ADD/ADHD as well as helping kids overcome their fears. Since I am in Florida, I am always asked about programs here and honestly, there are not that many. Well, not many in my opinion - if you know my story and my organization , I am a bit on the picky side. Attention Children (Aged 10-16) With ADHD/ADD: Horse Kid Scholarship 2009 for Danielle Herb’s ADHD Horse Level 1 Master Class 21st - 28th June 2009- Visit http://www.adhdkidsscholarship.com/ Start Your Summer In Florida With Danielle Herb, The ADHD/ADD Natural Horsemanship Coach WHAT: The ADHD Horse Level 1 Master Class is an exciting new weeklong program developed by Danielle Herb and Drop Your Reins to help you manage your ADD/ADHD using natural techniques and without the need for prescription drugs. WHO: Children Diagnosed with ADHD/ADD Aged 10-16 WHEN: June 21-28, 2009 WHERE: North Florida - Cheers Ranch - http://cheerhorseranch.com/ The Master Cla...

Happy Father’s Day 2009 to all fathers as well as father figures! And many mothers out there that have the role of both mother and father, as myself. Take the time to spend some time with that special person that deserves to be recognized. Take the time to appreciate those that love you unconditionally, they are priceless. A special note to my father, thanks for all your support – always! Also to my son-in-law, who is a fantastic dad to my grandchildren! I am very fortunate. Here is an article about father’s today. Experts: Dads embracing active parenting more by Karina Bland – Jun. 21, 2009 12:00 AM The Arizona Republic It’s just after lunch on a Friday, and Johnny Ruiz of Gilbert is outside with his three boys, pumping up the tires on their bikes. Like a growing number of fathers, Ruiz spends a lot of time with his kids, juggling part-time jobs so he can be home when they get out of school. In most families, it’s still Mom who does the majority of the work when it comes to raising ch...

WHAT IS INHALANT ABUSE? Over a year ago a parent emailed about this serious concern that you need to learn more about. Why? Inhalants can be found in just about everyones home - garage - basement - bathrooms - even your vanities! Yes, nail polish remover can be used as inhalants. Alliance for Consumer Education helps you learn more. The Alliance for Consumer Education (ACE) is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization founded in. The ACE mission is “to promote responsible and beneficial use of products to ensure a safer, healthier and cleaner environment in homes, businesses and the community.” Its core program areas are: Inhalant Abuse Prevention, Disease Prevention, Poison Prevention, and Product Management. Source: Inhalant.org Inhalant abuse refers to the deliberate inhalation or sniffing of common products found in homes and communities with the purpose of "getting high." Inhalants are easily accessible, legal, everyday products. When used as intended, these products have a u...

Education.com Launches 2009 Summer Activities Challenge Leading website for parents encourages families to have fun learning together this summer, while preparing for the next school year and earning a chance to win LEGO® Sets or a Dell laptop computer. REDWOOD CITY, CA – June 19, 2009 Education.com http://bit.ly/summer-challenge > , a leading web destination for parents of school-aged children, has launched its 2009 Summer Activities Challenge to help parents keep their kids excited about learning during the summer break. All families who complete the Challenge will receive a personalized certificate of achievement and will be entered to win a Dell Latitude 2100 Netbook http://bit.ly/EQKnC > or one of 100 LEGO Creator Mini Sets. To complete the Challenge, parents must register on Education.com and complete at least 20 Education.com activities with their kids during the contest dates of June 22 to August 31. Education.com Editor-in-Chief Danielle Wood explains the company’s deci...

As summer is here, teens, if not kept busy, could potentially find peer groups that are not what you would want him/her to hang with. Teen Gangs can prey on kids that are not only followers, but have low self worth and want to belong – even if it is a negative peer group. Yesterday I had Blogged about this topic on my main Blog . Learn more from Connect with Kids. Source: Connect with Kids - GANGS “Usually I know guys paralyzed for life…sipping through straws.” – “Jose”, 19 He doesn’t want to reveal his name. We’ll call him “Jose”. He was 12 when he joined a gang. Jose says, “I’m looking at them like, ‘Do I really want to do this?’ And they’re like, ‘If you’re going to do it you’ve got to say yes, you don’t think about it.’” Saying yes meant a three-minute beating from four older gang members. He says, “They only give you three chances to fall down. After the third one, you got jumped for being stupid.” He didn’t fall down. He was beaten and bloody, but he made it into the gang. Poli...

Tangerine Times is a great website of articles and insights on parenting! It is definitely one of my favorites. What do teens want???? Can we as parents ever win? Since my kids are young adults now I can say, yes, eventually it does get easier. Patience..... Source: Tangerine Times For parents of teens, it’s an everyday experience to see the rapidly evolving use of technology by teenagers. The shifting can happen whether there is a new, hot product out our not. Many times it is simply teens finding a new application or use for an existing product or service. Marketing firms are scrambling to pin-down this potentially huge market but it’s like hitting a moving target. Well… now you know how it feels to PARENT a teenager!! Tina Wells, chief executive of Buzz Marketing Group, says: “Technology is starting to define what’s cool in a way that fashion used to define what’s cool.” For teens, “as long as it’s technology, it’s what’s hot”. Translation: the geek is not necessarily the un -coo...