Sexual Bullying and Slut Shaming: The Impact on Youth
There are many forms of online cruelty. The irony of it is I read so much about youth bullying, and I don't want to diminish that it is an important issue -- but the fact is adults are not only victims of harassment, they can be the perpetrators too. As I continue to write about bullying and cyberbullying, it never ceases to amaze me how many different ways people have discovered to hate others -- whether it is on the playground or virtually, peer cruelty doesn't seem to have any limits or boundaries.
Yes, the very people that should be our children's role models (sports figures, celebrities, politicians, teachers, elders, etc... people we should respect) can be the direct people that are acting like children online or otherwise.
We have heard the stories of fat shaming, face shaming, parent shaming (moms judging moms), baby shaming, cyber-shaming and this year I read more about the ugliness of slut shaming (from adults).
Most have heard and read about revenge porn.
Slut shaming (sexual bullying) is different, yet some may confuse it with porn since the word slut is a slur for girls or women that are believed to have been engaged in many sexual partners.
The UnSlut Project, founded by Emily Lindin, is about giving young girls a voice -- a voice that Emily herself offers to girls across the world that are sexually bullied. Once a victim of slut shaming, she knows she was fortunate that she decided on her darkest days - not to take her life.
Others, such as Amanda Todd and Audrie Potts, were not as fortunate.
Being bullied in any form is cruel. Sexual bullying is only yet another form of cruelty that youth have no control over. Like the telephone game, before you know it, the girl has slept with the entire football team or school for that matter -- and has no way to defend herself.
The UnSlut Project aired their documentary "UnSlut: A Documentary Film." In 2013, Halifax teenager Rehtaeh Parsons took her own life after being raped and ostracized by her classmates. Through the stories of four women who overcame various sexual shaming, this film explores how we can work toward a world where the word "slut" doesn't even make sense as an insult.
Most everyone agrees bullying and cyberbullying needs to stop. Education and awareness it the key to prevention. The more you know the more you are able to be part of the solution.
Emily Lindin continues to be a voice in curbing online hate and slut shaming. As an expert and contributor in my new book, Shame Nation: The Global Epidemic of Online Hate (Sourcebooks) she reminds young girls when she speaks with them about sharing nudes....
Emily points out that online porn is readily available, so these boys already have all the masturbatory material they could ever desire—what they are really after is power to lord over you, control you, even blackmail you.
She asks young women pointedly, “Do you really want to give them that power?”
Emily’s question can equally relate to adults. Ultimately, the decision to share nude photos of yourself is yours, and yours alone, to make. And if it happens that someone out there chooses to exploit your nude photos—it’s not your fault. But, please, before sharing a nude, know the risks and take time to consider the potential consequences.
