Showing posts from October, 2008

Sue Scheff: ADHD Parenting Tips

Source: ADDitude Magazine

ADHD Parenting Tips: Be Positive and Calm

What does my style of parenting look like? Let’s say your nine-year-old refuses to comply with a simple request, like “Please pick up your toys.” Don’t repeat your request. Don’t yell or threaten a time-out. Instead, respond with action — firm, calm, quiet, and dramatic.

For instance, you might begin placing the toys into a container. If the child asks what you’re doing, you can say that the toys will remain in your possession until she pays you a small sum or performs certain chores. Your floor will be free of clutter — and your child will be more likely to comply next time.

Read entire article:

Sue Scheff: Advocates for Youth - Parent and Teen Information

Advocates for Youth - - offers a comprehensive website of information for parenting and teens today. Articles covering issues that kids are dealing with today and helping parents to communicate better with their teens and tweens.Source: Advocates for Youth10 Tips for Talking about the Facts of Life
Also available in [PDF] format.Initiating conversations about the facts of life may be difficult for some parents because they did not grow up in an environment where the subject was discussed. Some parents may be afraid they do not know the right answers or feel confused about the proper amount of information to offer.
To help, here are 10 tips from the experts at Advocates for Youth:

First, encourage communication by reassuring your children that they can talk to you about anything.
Take advantage of teachable moments. A friend's pregnancy, news article, or a TV show can help start a conversation.

Listen more than you talk. Think about what you're …

Sue Scheff: Keeping Teens from Cheating

Source: Connect with Kids

“You see it everywhere, you see it on the websites, all of these paper mills - places where you can buy papers, [there are] a variety of ways you can cheat, huge variety of ways. [And many teens think] ‘Well, if it’s so widespread, how could it be so wrong?’”

– Hal Thorsrud, Ph.D, assistant professor of philosophy, Agnes Scott College

“Hi YouTube, it’s me Kiki,” says a young teenage girl staring into her web camera. “Today I’m going to show you guys how to cheat on a test … the effective way.”

This video on YouTube, that had over 100,000 hits in the first week after it was posted, is a tutorial for cheating.

“I know it’s not a good thing to cheat,” Kiki continues, “it’s like academic dishonesty blah, blah, blah … but you know, everyone, I think everyone has at least done it once.”

Kids know cheating is wrong, but still they do it. Why?

“Sometimes the teacher doesn’t give us enough time on our work and we run out of time,” says one girl, “and we have no where else to…

Sue Scheff: Safe Teen Driving Club

Are you a parent of a new teenage driver or is your teen about to take the wheel? Be an educated parent - learn more here on this valuable website promoting Safe Teen Driving! ***************** Our mission is to educate parents and provide them services they can use to keep their teen safe and alive while driving. It's pretty well known that driving crashes are the #1 cause of teen injury and death, taking a back seat to suicide, homocide, drugs, alcohol and all other causes.Feel free to visit our site at, or our blog at

You'll find safety tips, information on our Crash Free America educational program for parents and services and products that are proven to reduce the chances of a crash with your teen.

You can also see a short video about the Club and other media coverage at

Sue Scheff - Parents Universal Resource Experts - Cyberbullying

Source: Connect with Kids

“I’d block them, but then they’d have another screen name and they’d be like ‘you’re a whore, you can’t get away from this’… It would just bring me to tears and I would cry because I couldn’t get away from it as much as I tried.”

– Erica Bryant, 18 years old

Everyday at school, Erica Bryant was harassed. “They’d call me a slut, call me a whore.”

The bullying became too much, so her parents decided to have her home schooled.

“So, sure, a huge part of the problem was resolved in that she didn’t have to face that trauma everyday, she didn’t have to sit in the lunchroom by herself,” explains her mom, Linda Perloff, “but what we didn’t expect was the power of the Internet …we didn’t expect the instant messaging.”

Erica explains her frustration: “I’d block them, but then they’d have another screen name and they’d be like ‘you’re a whore, you can’t get away from this. It would just bring me to tears and I would cry because I couldn’t get away from it, as much as I tried.”

Dozier Internet Law: $11.3 Million Sue Scheff Defamation Judgment Confirmed on Appeal

Dozier Internet Law is constantly battling the scofflaws of the web. On the one hand, the Internet as a whole opens up the world to everyone. On the other hand, it opens up the world to, everyone. Defamation laws and related judicial interpretations evolved historically at a time, and in an environment, in which there were inherent protections that served as a filter of sorts. Today those protections are lost to the ability to distribute attacks to millions overnight. Want to physically picket a business? You have to invest time and disclose your identity if you are going to coordinate and show up at a business. Want to print and distribute flyers, or take out an advertisement or run a commercial? Expensive, of course. And newspapers and television wouldn't print, even as ads or commercials, alot of the outrageous claims and statements being readily distributed online.

Once in a while, Dozier Internet Law sees comments encouraging such illegality from what might seem to b…

Sue Scheff: Parenting ADHD Children

Source: ADDitude Magazine

Help Socially Immature Kids Make Friends and Succeed at School

How to help children with ADHD improve behavior and social skills to make friends and do well at school.

The problem: The social maturity of children with attention deficit disorder (ADD ADHD) may be a few years behind that of their peers. In addition, they have difficulty reading verbal and physical social cues, misinterpreting remarks, or not getting jokes or games. Thus, their responses and reactions are often inappropriate, and it may be difficult to make friends their own age.

The reason: ADHD is a developmental disorder in which brain maturation is delayed. The student’s development may also be uneven. Students may behave appropriately in some situations but not in others, leading some unenlightened adults to believe “they can behave when they want to.”

The obstacles: ADHD children are usually not aware of how immature or off-base they may seem to peers and adults. They cannot adequately read o…

Sue Scheff: Free Speech is still Here, but it won't Condone Internet Defamation

Back in September 2006, I was awarded over $11.3M jury verdict for damages. They were defamatory and false statements about my organization, myself and my family. I fought back, and won! The defendant attempted to have the judgment set aside - although she was firmly denied in July 2007, she filed an appeal. Today, it is official - she loses again in the appellate court, and the $11.3M judgment stands firm! Free speech is still in tact, but it will not condone defamation. Remember, think before your post - sometimes keystrokes can be costly!

Citizen Leadership by Sue Scheff

As American citizens, we find ourselves in a privileged and unique position as members of the most powerful Democratic state in the entire world. But the luxuries we enjoy in this country come with a powerful responsibility—the responsibility of positive citizenship. We must all embrace our unique ability to be good citizens, and we must maintain our civic duty by helping the community around us through positive civic involvement. This site is dedicated to helping show people how they can be a positive part of their community and truly embrace the ideal of a good citizen.

My name is Sue Scheff™, and I’ve been working to help promote proper parenting techniques and information through Parent’s Universal Resource Experts, an organization I created in 2001 that helps compile information and share parenting knowledge among an ever expanding network of concerned families. I want to use this web site to share some of the things I’ve learned through my involvement with parenting advocacy, an…

(Sue Scheff) Stop Interrupting! Better ADHD School Behavior

How teachers and parents can inspire better ADHD school behavior with help from these impulse-controlling exercises for children with attention-deficit.

by ADDitude Editors

The problem: The student with attention deficit disorder (ADD ADHD) interrupts the teacher and classmates by calling out answers or commenting while others are speaking.The reason: Children with ADHD have difficulty controlling their impulses. Scientists believe that a problem with dopamine, a brain chemical, causes them to respond immediately and reflexively to their environment — whether the stimulus is a question, an idea, or a treat.

That’s why they often seem to act or talk before thinking, and ADHD school behavior suffers as a result.The obstacles: Children with ADHD may not be aware that they are interrupting. Even if they are, they have difficulty understanding that their behavior is disturbing or disruptive to others.Simply telling them their behavior is wrong doesn’t help. Even though they know this, their i…

Sue Scheff: What are your kids putting Online?

I read this very interesting Blog today on today's kids and what they can put online about not only themselves, but about their parents! Not excluding other family members.

By Eve Tahmincioglu

Are your Internet-crazed kids sabotaging your job search/career?

Who knows things about you that you’d rather not share with the general public? That you drink two or three martinis every night. Maybe you like to call in sick when you’re really not sick to play basketball with the kids. Or maybe you’re prone to punching in walls when you fight with your spouse.
I’ve written a lot about digital dirt lately. You know, the negative information about you on the Internet you don’t want your boss or prospective employers to see.

Well, here’s a minefield you better keep an eye on — Your own digitally savvy kids that seem to spend every waking moment of their lives sending weird things to eachother on Facebook, or MySpace.

The owner of, Michael Fertick, recently told me of a new p…

Sue Scheff Shares "Wit's End!" with the Florida Sun-Sentinel

'Wit's End' book offers advice to help out-of-control teens

By Liz Doup South Florida Sun-SentinelOctober 8, 2008

A decade ago, when her 14-year-old daughter spiraled out of control, Sue Scheff didn't know where to turn.

As a result, the Weston mom sent Ashlyn to a residential program that harmed rather than helped, she says. It was a drastic move after her daughter had temporarily run away and threatened violence.

In hindsight, Scheff wishes she had looked more closely at schools and asked more questions. To help parents avoid her mistakes, she started researching programs that offer professional treatment in a residential setting. She put what she learned in the recently published book, Wit's End: Advice and Resources for Saving Your Out-of-Control Teen (Health Communications Inc.; $14.95). She also created Parents' Universal Resource Experts Inc. (

Read the entire article here:…

Teen Suicide - by Sue Scheff

Suicide is the third most common cause of death amongst adolescents between 15-24 years of age, and the sixth most common cause of death amongst 5-14 year olds. It is estimated that over half of all teens suffering from depression will attempt suicide at least once, and of those teens, roughly seven percent will succeed on the first try. Teenagers are especially vulnerable to the threat of suicide, because in addition to increased stress from school, work and peers, teens are also dealing with hormonal fluctuations that can complicate even the most normal situations.

Because of these social and personal changes, teens are also at higher risk for depression, which can also increase feelings of despair and the desire to commit suicide.

In fact, according to a study by the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) almost all people who commit suicide suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder or substance abuse disorder. Often, teens feel as though they have no other way out of their prob…

Sue Scheff: Teen Truancy

Truancy is a term used to describe any intentional unauthorized absence from compulsory schooling. Children in America today lose over five million days of their education each year through truancy. Often times they do this without the knowledge of their parents or school officials. In common usage the term typically refers to absences caused by students of their own free will, and usually does not refer to legitimate "excused" absences, such as ones related to a medical condition. It may also refer to students who attend school but do not go to classes. Because of this confusion many schools have their own definitions, and as such the exact meaning of the term itself will differ from school to school and district to district. In order to avoid or diminish confusion, many schools explicitly define the term and their particular usage thereof in the school's handbook of policies and procedures. In many instances truancy is the term referring to an absence associated with t…

Sue Scheff: Students' Guide to Saying No to Cheating

By Dr. Lisa Medoff

As school is now open - first semester in full swing - these books are a tremendous help for parents and kids.

With a rise in recent years in the number of students seeking mental health services, an increase in cheating behavior in school, and constant concern from parents, teachers, and especially students about academic achievement, the time is now for a book series to address academic stress.

Personally, these books by Lisa Medoff are a very easy read for both parents and kids - if you have a niece, nephew, son, daughter, friend that is a teen or pre-teen - there is a lot to gain from these books.

Type the title in the Amazon Box for more information.

Sue Scheff: Learning More About Teens and the Internet

In today's society, the Internet has made its way into almost every American home. It is a well-known fact that the web is a valuable asset for research and learning. Unfortunately, it can also be a very dangerous place for teens. With social networking sites like Myspace and Friendster, chat rooms, instant messaging, and online role-playing video games, our children are at access to almost anyone. Sue Scheff, along with Parent's Universal Resource Experts™, is tackling the dangers of the web.

Keeping tabs on our teens' online habits doesn't just keep them safe from online predators. More and more parents are becoming wary of the excessive hours their teens spend surfing the web, withdrawing from family, friends and activities they used to enjoy. Internet Addiction is a devastating problem facing far too many teens and their families. While medical professionals have done limited research on the topic, more and more are recognizing this destructive behavior and even mor…

Sue Scheff: Getting Teens Talking

I speak with parents frequently and the most common problems I hear is the lack of communication with their teenagers today. Connect with Kids has a great article to help you break through this communication barrier with some great tips and ideas in dealing with your teens.

Source: Connect with Kids

"You can push too much and that’ll shut the child down. So it’s a fine balance: Be available, be a good listener, and also know when you do need to push in case they’re into some things that they shouldn’t be.”

– Gloria Meaux, Ph.D., psychologist

How much do teenagers tell their parents?

“I hardly share anything with my parents,” says 16-year-old Derek Kelley.

“I share very little with my parents,” says 18-year-old Tyler Wichelhaus.

And Jessie Donaghy gives an example of a question she hates: “How was your day?”

“When you’ve had a horrible day, you just feel like people at school are mad at you,” she says. “Your classes went horribly, you failed a test. It can almost be an insult without them…

Sue Scheff: Raising Teens in a New Culture

Source: Shoulder to Shoulder

Raising teens poses enough challenges in itself - parenting a teen in a new culture adds another level of complexity. Chances are, your teen years were very different than your child's will be living in America. Here's a few things to keep in mind as you guide your teen into young adulthood:

YOUR TEEN MAY TRY TO FIT THE "AMERICAN" NORM.We may not like it, but this is normal. Sometimes it means they will dress in strange ways or "reject" their culture. Peer pressure is a big deal to kids at this age, and they're just trying to fit in with the rest of their friends and schoolmates at this time.

PASS ON YOUR CULTURE AND LANGUAGE.Your teen should know your family's traditions, beliefs, religion and language, as well as the story of your journey to America. Right now, teens may not be interested or even "rebuff" their culture. As they grow up, they will learn to appreciate their language, food and customs - and take…