The Blog of P.U.R.E. and Sue Scheff

Although the pandemic might be mostly behind us, there are some lingering issues that have left parents with more concerns. Remote learning did not benefit every student, and we witnessed a surge in the need for  adolescent mental health services . Online learning was necessary and still holds value for many students. With the  increased screen time , we also need to equip our students with both emotional and media literacy skills to handle cyberbullying. Prevalence of Online Harassment of Teens In  2018, PEW Research  shared that the majority of teens have been the target of online harassment and believe it is a big problem. According to the  Cyberbullying Research Center , student victimization has been increasing steadily over the past 5 years. Another study in  2019 in  SAJIM  said that students were negatively affected both emotionally and academically by cyberbullying—to the extent that some thought of  suicide .  About 41 percent ...

There's no app for parenting teens online today - yet according to a recent PEW Research survey 95 percent of teenagers have access to a smartphone while almost half, 45 percent claim they are online constantly.  That's up significantly from the last survey in 2015 when it was 24 percent were on almost constantly. What else has changed? Where the kids are virtually hanging out. In 2015, 71 percent of teens were still using Facebook as their primary social scene. Today it's dropped to fourth place. In the lead is YouTube at 85 percent, Instagram 72 percent and Snapchat at 69 percent. Parenting in the age of technology. No matter where our kids and teens are gravitating to online, parenting doesn't change. Like growing up offline, it's never without challenges, however today it's compounded with their digital life being as important as their real one. As a matter of fact, most teen's believe that their online life is their life - period. A...

In 2017 we heard a lot about digital resilience , but do we understand what it is? Helping our teens be ready for online hate and digital discourse offline can better prepare them when they are faced with it. Reality is that incivility exists - sadly this is a human behavior that we don't have control over, but we can choose how we handle it. Today our kids consider their digital life as important as their lives offline, so it's important to give them as much knowledge and encouragement to know they are not alone when they are faced with cyber-hate. Cyberbullying is not only impacting our teen's emotionally - it causes them to miss school, become withdrawn, drop out of sports or other activities they once enjoyed, failing when they were once good students, changing peer groups or becoming isolated and more. Teens can experience a higher level of stress and anxiety when they are struggling with online bullying. The most troubling outcome of cyberbullying and online ha...

Internet safety, cyberbullying and bullying is a major concern for people of  all  ages. Whether you’re tween is being harassed online or in school, or maybe a teenager that is being mocked on Facebook or any social media platform, as a parent it’s your job to try to be involved as much as possible. This isn’t always easy, which is probably why it’s topping the highest health concern among parents according to a new national poll. Each year, the  C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital National Poll  on Children’s Health asks a national sample of adults to identify health topics that are a “ big problem ” for children and teens. The number one concern parents stated was  cyberbullying/bullying  at  61 percent  with  internet safety  at  55 percent. Communication is key We understand that talking with our children is crucial when it comes to online safety. Are you someone that believes your child is more tech-savvy...

There are many forms of online cruelty. The irony of it is I read so much about youth bullying, and I don't want to diminish that it is an important issue -- but the fact is adults are not only victims  of harassment, they can be the perpetrators too.   As I continue to write about bullying and cyberbullying, it never ceases to amaze me how many different ways people have discovered to hate others -- whether it is on the playground or virtually, peer cruelty doesn't seem to have any limits or boundaries.  Yes, the very people that should be our children's role models (sports figures, celebrities, politicians, teachers, elders, etc... people we should respect ) can be the direct people that are acting like children online or otherwise. We have heard the stories of fat shaming , face shaming, parent shaming (moms judging moms), baby shaming , cyber-shaming and this year I read more about the ugliness of slut shaming  (from adults)....

Is your teen a victim of cyberbullying? Warning signs your teen might be struggling with online harassment: Appears to be sad, angry or even frustrated after texting or online. Avoids wanting to talk about their digital activity. (At which point you should encourage them to get online with you, have them teach you something about social media - a new app, anything to get them talking. Open the lines of communication as much as possible). Suddenly stops using their digital devices. Becomes abnormally withdrawn from activities they typically like. Finds excuses to not be at school or with friends. Drop in grades, underachieving. Have you exhausted your local resources? Local therapy is not working or your teen is refusing to attend or engage? Keep in mind, cyberbullying is a serious emotional concern. Teen's will go back and re-visit the mean post/comment over and over again and obsess on it. They will eventually become extremely distraught and depressed. Some teens have...

It's no longer about a simple mean tweet or harsh comment, we are now dealing with verbal violence and cyber-harassment.    Shame Nation: The Global Epidemic of Online Hate (Sourcebooks) is finally here, make no mistake about it, we're all a click away from digital disaster. With 92% of Americans armed with smartphones -- ready to record your most embarrassing moments. The rise of social media and "always-on connectivity" has broadened the scope of online harassment.  Harassers can be anonymous and reach you 24/7, posting messages and photos that are difficult to erase. Whether in the form of cyberbullying among teens and children, or cyber harassment among adults, online harassment comes in many different forms and can lead to detrimental effects, both emotionally and physically. Fortunately, there are ways that we can protect ourselves, our children, and others from cyberbullying and cyber harassment. There are best practices for online safety, common...

With back to school around the corner, the concern of bullying and cyberbullying is on many parents minds. Whenever you are being harassed or bullied online, especially if virtual violence or otherwise is involved, being able to tell someone is imperative. With younger people we encourage them to tell their parents, however we know at times this can be difficult. They fear their will lose their online privileges or not be taken seriously. In a report by Unicef the majority of adolescents polled said the would turn to a friend, and that’s okay. As long as you tell someone. 54% said they would tell a friend. 48% said they would tell a parent. 19% said they would tell a teacher.

Can you guess what crisis is affecting 25 percent of our children today? It’s not ebola or drug addiction. We can rule out measles and depression, because the answer is not a disease at all. The answer might come as a surprise to many, but  cyberb ullying is hurting one quarter  of our children. Unfortunately, cyberbullying might actually be more prevalent than previous studies have shown. In fact, recent data shows that the  rates of cyberbullying have actually tripled  within the last year!  The newer study estimates that 87 percent of our youth have experienced or been affected by cyberbullying. This is devastating for parents to realize, because all the education and awareness about this issue is not making a huge difference for our tween and teen populations. Tragic Consequences: Cyberbullying Matters October is National Cyberbullying Prevention Month and provides the perfect opportunity to make sure we are helping our families to delete this tre...

Your Child's Online Behavior Is a Reflection of Offline Parenting Raising children in a digital society can be challenging. Today kids are exposed to technology and are sometimes given their very own keypads in their first years of life. Generations earlier, the big talk was about the birds and the bees. Maybe parents would discuss this with us only a few times. A handful at the most -- sometimes not even that much in our adolescent years. Sex was (and is) a topic that many parents want to talk about as briefly as possible and then walk away. When it comes to the digital world, there is no walking away. The reality for today’s youth is that their online reputation will someday determine their college admission and very possibly their future employer. Every keystroke, post, and comment counts. Your child's online social skills are as critical as their offline people skills. Where do you begin? In tech terms -- by chatting . The tech talk is not a conve...

Bullying and cyberbullying is an issue that everyone is concerned about.  From verbal abuse to online harassment, words can be used as lethal weapons. On the same measure, words can be used to build people up too! Your words matter, keystrokes count — how will you use them? One of the most important ways your child can be proactive in helping others that are victims of cruel behavior such as bullying, is to become an  upstander . 10 ways to become an upstander by  School Climate : Learn more about mean, cruel, and bullying behavior.  Educate yourself and your community with the resources on  BullyBust.org . For example: Why do kids bully? Where does bullying take place most often in your school? What are the effects of bullying? How can we prevent it? Understanding this information will help you if you are bullied, and will help you to stand up to bullies if a friend or classmate is being bullied. Help others who are being bullied.  Be a frien...

Most Teens Spend at Least 3 Hours a Day Socializing Online AT&T and  Tyler Clementi Foundation  Survey 1,000 Area Teens and Parents: Find Pervasive Cyberbullying and Significant Awareness Gap Between Parents and Teens As middle and high school students spend more time online than ever before, a survey of New York City-area teenagers and parents finds cyberbullying is a prevalent issue that touches a vast majority of area children. The poll of 1,000 parents and teens in New York City, Long Island, Westchester and northern New Jersey was conducted by  AT&T  and the Tyler Clementi Foundation. 48%  of teens have experienced cyberbullying. 8 in 10  know someone who has been the victim of cyberbullying. Unlike in-person bullying at school or outside the home, cyberbullying is happening right under parents’ noses. A majority of teens  (53% ) spend at least 3 hours a day online, with most of this socializing ( 86% ) taking place at home. ...