The Blog of P.U.R.E. and Sue Scheff

Summer programs and camps can be an excellent time to give your teenager a boost of self-esteem as well as helping them with  grade recovery  if they have been underachieving during the school year. If your teen has been making bad choices for a while, chances are good it will take longer than 6-9 weeks to undo this negative behavior. However since making the decision to leap into a  residential treatment center or therapeutic boarding school  is not only an emotional one, it’s also very expensive — starting with a good  summer program  can sometimes be a way to determine if your teen is a fit for the longer-term program. After attending a summer program, you can determine the following: 1. They come home and go back to school in the fall. 2. They continue with the residential therapy educational program. 3. They come home, go back to school and if things don’t go so well, you know that he/she can go back to that program and finish it. ...

Parents can be naive when it comes to their teen using marijuana today.  The fact is, it's not the marijuana from generations earlier.  Yes, it is legalized today and there are valid reasons for this, however there are still studies and reasons that the drug use for minors can potentially cause them harm. More importantly, it can lead to different types of drug experimentation which are more risky and even potentially deadly.  It's no different with pills. Share this video with your friends and family. How is marijuana likely to affect you? Learning:  Marijuana’s effects on attention and memory make it difficult to learn something new or do complex tasks that require focus and concentration.  Sports:  Marijuana affects timing, movement, and coordination, which can harm athletic performance.  Judgment:  Marijuana, like most abused substances, can alter judgment. This can lead to risky behaviors that can expose the user to sexually...

As we are in the summer months it can lead to more time for experimentation of substances.  Maybe your teen wants to fit in with a different peer group or maybe they have been using drugs and want to try new ones. It is important for parents not to be in denial.  The best of kids can make bad decisions.  Think of your own childhood - we all learn from mistakes.  Sadly today drugs are much more dangerous and deadly than they were generations earlier. 10 Tips for Prevention and Awareness of Drug Use: 1.   Communication is the key to prevention . Whenever an opportunity to talk about the risks of drinking and driving or the dangers of using drugs presents itself, take it and start a conversation. 2.   Have a conversation not a confrontation . If you suspect your teen is using drugs, talk to her. Don't judge her; instead, talk to her about facts behind the dangers of substance abuse. If your teen isn't opening up to you, be sure you find an adolescen...

It is the time of year when many parents will contact us and ask about  summer programs . Depending on your teenager, sometimes a good summer program can be the answer you are looking for, but let’s talk about some things to consider. If your teen has been making these bad choices for a while, chances are good it will take longer than 6-9 weeks to undo this negative behavior.  Remember, first the program need to fit the root of them issues – then work through them and help your teen start to make the better choices. Many youths when they reach this point are usually failing or on the edge of failing in school.  Most summer programs, especially Wilderness, don’t offer a grade recovery program.  Finding a sound residential therapy or summer grade recovery program with emotional growth might be a better option.  There are exceptions if you are dealing with a teen that is an addict, has an eating disorder or a mental disorder that is more serious. Summer ...

Parent's Universal Resource Experts, Inc launched their new website today.  It still has several glitches - links not active, but overall it is up and running.  We hope you like it.  It has been years since it had a face-lift. In addition to being mobile ready, we have added a 3-minute video.  Take time to learn more about us and how we have helped many families since 2001.  If you need help with an at-risk teen, please feel free to contact us at www.helpyourteens.com .

Have you been struggling to make a decision for treatment with your teenager?  It can be one of the most difficult ones a parent makes.  Especially since it doesn't seem natural to send a child to residential therapy - we give birth to a bubbly happy baby - only to find ourselves facing these stressful decisions. Now, a new study is released on drug treatment programs. If you are considering residential therapy for your teenager, visit www.helpyourteens.com .

Have you discovered your teenager failed a class or two?  Are they missing credits? There are programs that can help them acquire grade recovery this summer.  Maybe your teen is struggling with defiance, they disrespect you or are engaging in risky behavior.  You are not convinced that they warrant a full-time residential therapy. Summer is a perfect time to explore a therapeutic boarding school that offers a summer program to determine if it is a fit for your teen.  It is important that it offers academics - since chances are likely your child is behind academically.  This can be part of their stress that brings on low-self-worth which feeds into making bad choices. If you need resources please visit www.helpyourteens.com and fill out a quick form for a free parent consultation. 

With the recent death of actor Philip Seymour Hoffman many people are discussing the topic of addiction. It is an evil disease -- one that has taken many lives way too young, not only celebrities, but many others. This is why parents need to understand the importance of continuing to talk with your children about the risks of substance abuse.  This is not your average marijuana -- in some cases -- that is being sold to kids, as reported on 20/20 about a year ago. Dealers are getting savvy and hoping to "hook" your teen. Yes, marijuana is legal in some states, however this is with good cause for medical reasons, not for the reasons teens are looking for.  This is where parenting needs to take over to explain the division. So what is the difference between substance abuse and addiction?  When will it cross over? The diagnostic criteria for Substance Abuse is defined as a maladaptive pattern of substance use leading to clinically significant impairm...

The holidays are over, school is back in session and your teen is still driving you mad! So many parents hope and pray, with each day - week - month - maybe after the holidays, after this or after that, things will get better.... Sometimes they do - however most of the time, the behavior seems to escalate. As a parent you will go back to trying local therapy, if you can convince your teen to attend - maybe find peer support groups.  Then maybe out-patient, in-patient - maybe they think a few meds will do the trick..... Yes, I am being a bit facetious.  I am not someone that is against medication when it is needed, but I see too often that teens are given mood stabilizers or anti-depressants so quickly.  (This happened with my own child) - when in reality we are dealing with kids today that have spoiled rotten brats - entitlement issues - and teens today that simple act-out when they don't get their own way? After parents have exhausted all their local resources,...

No matter what time of the year it is, dealing with a teenager that is pushing the limits and creating friction in your home can be a stressful time. Compound that with the holidays approaching and knowing there will be time off from school, can be a bit overwhelming.  Will they get into more trouble or will they be busy with constructive projects?  Maybe get a part-time job? In most cases, my colleague and I hear from parents that are at their wit's end and realize that if they don't intervene the consequences could be serious. Holiday time is not always the most opportune time of year, however troubled teenagers don't know when to take vacations. When parents call us for help in searching for residential therapy , many want to try to keep them as close to home as possible. There are some concerns we express when we speak with the parent about selecting a program as it pertains to the location: Convenience is nice, however the priority is what is best for yo...

Many parents call us all the time with two scenarios. 1)  My teen refuses to go to a therapist or counselor or 2)  My teen has been in therapy for years and it hasn't made a difference.  Even has changed therapist several times and nothing changes. So why will residential treatment make a difference? Fact is, we don't have a crystal ball but there is definitely a difference.  The one-on-one therapy once a week at home (in a doctor's office) is completely different than being in a therapeutic setting where all your child's activity is geared towards building him up to make better choices and also helping him to reflect on why he was making the negative ones that brought him to where he is now. Removing your teen from their comfort zone of home and mostly of their peer group can substantially change the way they think and react to situations.  You can finally peel back the layer they have to protect their egos (attitudes) and determine where all this...

You have finally reached your wit's end. You have exhausted all your local resources. Your teen is refusing local therapy - not that it is working at this point anyway. Your teen has so much academic potential, however is refusing to put any effort forward. Your teen has literally become someone you barely recognize - and you realize if you don't intervene you may not get another chance. Is it your fault? Is it the school? Is it their friends? We can waste time with the blame game all day and night long, but in the end it is your teen that is making these negative choices and it is your responsibility as a parent to make the right ones. So as many parents do - they hit the keyboard and are bombarded in a new and scarey world of the big business of "teen help". Red flags -red lights -and fear can quickly run through your mind - not to mention the sticker shock of many of these programs and schools. Take the time to breath and learn about exactly what ...

I hear this question a lot.  Of course the answer is only opinion based - and may depend on your child and your needs. Not sure whether to hire an EC?  Here is some food for thought: Educational Consultants (EC) were originally designed to help parents with their teens to find the right colleges and with the application process.  With the growth and expansion of technology, the need for their assistance has become nearly extinct.  Parents and students have found they can find quick results on CollegeBoard.org for about every school and every question they have. As the shift in teen help increased, they seemed to branch out into the residential treatment field. Most have not experienced what you are going through.  Most do not know what you are dealing with at home.  Only an experienced parent that has been there really knows that feeling of helplessness.   In the teen help industry a term that has been coined is the EC Shuffl...

It may start with pot, but where will it end? With the recent tragedy of Corey Monteith it leaves the door open for conversation. You may have a teen that is smoking pot.  I speak to many parents that believe that "it is only marijuana."  Maybe that is true, but have they considered what happens when their highly intelligent (because they also share with me how smart their teenager is) teen decides to maybe try some pills or alcohol with it? What is addiction? Addiction has long been understood to mean an uncontrollable habit of using alcohol or other drugs. Because of the physical effects of these substances on the body, and particularly the brain, people have often thought that “real” addictions only happen when people regularly use these substances in large amounts. Addiction – there is a psychological/physical component; the person is unable to control the aspects of the addiction without help because of the mental or physical conditions involved. – ...

   Is your teen withdrawing from the family? Summer is here and some parents will be considering summer camps while others are in the midst of hoping their teenager passed the school year, or had enough credits to graduate. If you are the parent of a teen who is struggling with school and acting out, it can drive you to your wit's end.   Maybe your once fun-loving teenager who is good looking, intelligent, and has lots of good friends is now talking back to you, staying out late or sneaking out, defiant, and possibly sexually active? On the flip side, your once sweet child might be a teenage misfit who is acting out because of bullying, or is experimenting with sex, drugs, and/or alcohol in a desperate attempt to find acceptance. What happens when you have a teenager that decides they don't want to finish high school when they are more than capable? Perhaps they were consistently getting excellent grades and now they are just getting by or failing...

This is a difficult question that many parents have to face on a daily basis.  Parents who spend a great deal of time with their teenagers are often tuned into what is normal behavior and what is not.  However, even parents who are actively involved in the daily activities of their teenagers may overlook – or subconsciously deny – the earliest signs of a substance abuse problem. Some of the clues that your teenager may exhibit when using drugs or alcohol are fairly subtle, but others are rather obvious:   Many hours spent alone, especially in their room; persistent isolation from the rest of the family.  This is particular suspicious in a youngster who had not been a loner until now.   Resistance to taking with or confiding in parents, secretiveness, especially in a teenager who had previously been open.  Be sure that your teenager is not being secretive because every time he tries to confide in you, you jump on him or break his confi...