Showing posts from July, 2009

Sue Scheff: Parents Learn More About Cyberbullys


Source: Connect with Kids

“What used to be done face to face or at slumber parties or on the telephone are now done through instant messaging and emails and etcetera. And the difference is it doesn’t go away. It can stay there permanently, it can be saved, it can be transmitted.”

– Joanne Max, Ph.D., Psychologist

For the online generation, here are the latest numbers: 91 percent of teens have an email address, 60 percent use instant messaging, 75 percent have a cell phone, 72 percent have a Facebook or Myspace page. And in a recent Harris Poll, one in five teens has been harassed online or by text message.

13-year-old Taylor has lots of online friends and one enemy: a girl who posted a web log making fun of Taylor and other kids.

“She was mostly calling everyone whores and sluts and ho’s,” says Taylor.

Taylor found out thru the grapevine at school that the girl was a classmate.

“She wrote down all the people’s names that she didn’t like, or didn’t care for, and she wrote somethi…

Sue Scheff: Raising a Child and Teens with Morals

Dr. Michele Borba is getting ready to release her BIG BOOK of Parenting Solutions, and she is giving you a sneak peak of what you will find inside.

Source: Reality Check Blog from Michele Borba

By Michele Borba

How to Raise a Moral Child

I recently worked with PARENTS magazine to conduct an online survey of over 2400 moms. One question: “How do you hope your child turns out?” Next to health and happiness, most parents hoped their children would grow to be adults with solid character and strong morals. One thing is certain: parents who raise moral kids don’t do so by accident. We also know that home is the best school for teaching character. And the best time to teach the beliefs and habits that boost strong character are in everyday intentional moments. Here are ten tips to help you raise your child to have a strong moral intelligence from my new book, The Big Book of Parenting Solutions.

1. Commit to Raising A Moral Child

How important is it for you to raise a moral child? It’s a crucial q…

Sue Scheff: Teen Challenge - FEARS: Are They As Big As They Feel?

Debra Beck is an author and mentor for teens, specializing in girls. Her first book, My Feet Aren't Ugly has helped thousands of girls empower themselves - build self esteem and make better choices in life. Read her recent Blog entry - FEARS: Are They As Big As They Feel?

By Debra Beck

What are you afraid of? There is plenty to fear--whether you are a child, a teenager or an adult. Fears come in all shapes and sizes from the Boogieman to the Taxman. You can be afraid of speaking in front of a crowd, growing old, getting a bad grade on a test, losing friends, looking bad, embarrassing yourself. The list can go on and on. Everybody is afraid of something and to different degrees.

Are fears only as big as we make them?

Let’s take a look. Let’s say that you have a new boyfriend, and you really, really like him. You’re afraid that now that he has claimed to like you, he will wake up some morning only to like your best friend better. You’re so worried that you start asking him questions abo…

Sue Scheff: Learn About Teen Medicine Abuse

Community Impact on OTC Cough Medicine Abuse

Posted by Five Mom, Hilda Morales , on Friday, July 10, 2009

The summer heat means spending lots of time outdoors at community parks, pools, and events. No matter where you live, everyone savors the summer months when the crazy pace of life generally slows down and families get to spend more time together. Busy families also find they are likely to spend more time in their community, attending sporting events, picnics, or concerts. It’s a reassuring and comforting feeling to be a part of a community of people that you identify with and feel a connection to in a meaningful way. This connection can play an important role in the fight against over-the-counter cough medicine abuse.
Take a look at how one community assessed the risk factors that contribute to drug abuse in teenagers. It is easy to see how communities have a great deal of impact on the risky behaviors of their teens. In this article, we have taken a deeper look at ways our own commu…

Sue Scheff: When Parents Don’t Agree Over Discipline

Kara Tamanini, and author and therapist, wrote an interesting Blog entry today. I am sure there are parents that will relate to this. Be sure to visit for more great information from Kara Tamanini. Follow her on Twitter @KidTherapist

When Parents Don’t Agree Over Discipline

What do you do as a parent when your child is resistant to discipline and your spouse will not stand behind you and enforce the rules. As a therapist, I see this all the time. One parent is the “good guy” and the other one who disciplines and enforces the rules is the “bad guy”. No two parents agree all the time about discipline/boundaries and will parent the same, however some parents just don’t want to discipline at all and want their children to be their “friend”. Children and parents are NOT friends, your child needs a parent, their friends are at school. This is a serious problem as it puts one parent against the other and of course the child will play one parent against th…

Sue Scheff: Step Families Good for Kids - Blended Families

Source: Connect with Kids

“The challenges were having my kids listen to Gladys and having her kids listen to me – they didn’t.”

– Michael Uhri, a father

Every year, the parents of one million children get divorced. And every day, 1,300 new step-families are formed. Those first days and months aren’t easy, but studies show that kids who live in step-families are happier than children whose parents never re-marry.

When Gladys and Michael decided to marry, it wasn’t just one plus one … it was four plus four. Two families of divorce were joining each other, and the kids didn’t like it.

“We didn’t get along AT ALL,” says Tiffany, now 14 years old.

“I didn’t like having a whole new family,” says Ashley, 15.

Michael’s kids resented Gladys, and her kids wouldn’t listen to him.

“They stayed in their own room a lot; they found things to do by themselves a lot,” Gladys says.

Divorce is hard enough on children, but when a divorced parent remarries, joining a new family can be an emotionally difficult expe…

Sue Scheff: Promoting Teen Health, Nutrition and Body Image

I found a cool website for teens and parents. BodiMojo – promoting teen health, nutrition, and body image. Read more!

BodiMojo will be a premier nutrition, fitness and body image website built with teens, for teens, and focused on integrating online & off-line activities in fun and motivational way.
Teens told us what they wanted and we listened. BodiMojo will include elements of music, interactive tools, games, vids, creativity, community building, contests, original content and customized user pages for teens. BodiMojo will also offer its users new technology for fitness tracking and mobile motivation.

BodiMojo philosophy is simple: Health Can Be Cool

Nutritional experts, health professionals, fitness gurus along with our participating teen users will develop stories, articles, information, graphics, videos, interactive features and more.
This current site will provide information and updates on the development of the full BodiMojo website as well as receive content submissions from …

Sue Scheff: Warning Signs of Teen Depression

Common warning signs/symptoms of teenage depression

•Changes in eating and sleeping habits (eating and sleeping too much or too little)
•Significant change in weight (loss or gain)
•Often misses school and/or shows bad school performance
•Reclusive, withdrawing from friends or family members
•Quick to show anger/rage
•General restlessness or anxiety
•Overreacts to criticism, even constructive
•Seems very self conscious, guilty
•Unusual problems with authority
•No longer partakes in or enjoys activities and events they once loved
•Indecision, lack of concentration, or forgetfulness
•Feelings of worthlessness or guilt
•Frequent health complaints despite being healthy
•Lack of motivation and enthusiasm for every day life
•Drug/alcohol abuse
•Mentions or thoughts of suicide
Learn more - click here.

Sue Scheff: How to Treat a Specific Phobia

Kara Tamanini is an author and therapist and I can always find great information for parents on her website. By Kara Tamanini Most children go through different phases in which they are scared of different things when they are young. However, a child can develop a specific phobia to different things in which their fears are excessive or unreasonable. Now, you may say that everyone is scared of something at one time or another. However, children that have specific phobias become extremely fearful or terrified when a parent or adult even exposes them to the specific thing they are scared of. Children most often develop specific phobias to the following things: being in the dark, water, animals, going to the doctor or the dentist, and lastly thunderstorms or bad weather.

Children may display their fear or anxiety of a particular stimulus (ie… a dog) if the child is scared of dogs in a variety of ways. Children will typically display their anxiety or fear over t…

Sue Scheff: How to Choose Your Family Values & Become a More Intentional Parent

More great parenting advice from Parenting Expert and Guru, Michele Borba! Don't forget to order her BIG BOOK of Parenting Solutions.

By Michele Borba
How to Choose Your Family Values & Become a More Intentional Parent

REALITY CHECK: Parents don’t raise moral kids by accident. They know what they stand for and pass those values onto their children deliberately and purposefully. So here’s your Reality Check: If you sat your child down right now and asked: “What do we stand for in this house? or What values matter most to our family?” would your child be able to answer? If not, it just means you’re not tuning up your values strong enough so your child adopts them for his own moral core.

Suppose you were allowed just one wish for your children and just suppose your wish would be granted. Here is the rule: The wish must be something you personally can control (so it can’t things like your child’s health, financial status, or longevity). It must also be something you can inspire or nu…

Sue Scheff: Teens and Money

Debra Beck, an Author and Mentor to Teens, has a wonderful website and focus's on building your teens self esteem. Having self confidence can help your teen make better choices. Debra just posted a very timely Blog on Teens and Money - check it out!

By Debra Beck
It’s amazing to me how teens react to money differently. My oldest daughter didn’t like to spend her money or mine for that matter. She was always very picky about what she purchased to make sure that the money was well spent. My youngest on the other hand spent both of our money without a second thought, and sometimes on wasteful things.
I am noticing the same with my partners boys, one is very careful about his spending, and the other has the money spent in no time at all. What can we do as parents to assure that our teens have a certain amount of respect for money, no matter where it is coming from.
The first thing I suggest is starting at a young age. Be careful that you don’t give them eve…

Sue Scheff: The BIG Book of Parenting Solutions

As a Parent Advocate, I am a huge fan and friend of Michele Borba! I am very excited that her 23rd book will be released in September 2009.

The reviews are in and they are outstanding!

The Big Book of Parenting Solutions: 101 Answers to Your Everyday Challenges and Wildest Worries

Publishers Weekly
Borba, author and Today Show regular, employs a cookbooklike approach in her latest volume: rather than read through the entire tome, parents can flip to topics pertinent to their family. Borba opens with a friendly overview, noting that contemporary parents feel more stressed and find their roles increasingly difficult (June Cleaver, she points out, didn’t have to deal with cyberbullying or Facebook). With characteristic wit, Borba identifies the “seven deadly parenting styles,” including helicopter, buddy, incubator, bandage, paranoid, accessory parenting (judging themselves by their kids’ accolades) and secondary parenting (relinquishing power to such outsiders as marketers or the media).

Sue Scheff: Is Your Teen Sitting in Front of the Computer All Day?

Sarah Newton's Blog and Podcasts at Gen Y Guide has some great parenting information for parents today and the technology our kids are using! We need to try to stay ahead of our kids - it is summer - check this Blog out - I am sure many can relate!
Sick of your child sitting in front of the computer all day? By: Carol McNaughton via Sarah Newton (check out the Gen Y Website!)
Let’s face it, there is always plenty to do during the summer holidays. That isn’t the challenge. It is finding something our kids, especially teens, would rather do than sitting in front of the computer. When every suggestion is met with, “Boring!” what can a parent do? With two teens and a nine year old at home I know exactly where you are coming from and how difficult this can be. Is there a solution? Definitely!

Let’s take a quick look at our children’s generation, Generation Y or The Milleniums, to see who and what we are dealing with.

Research has shown that Gen Y are:
• Technologically brilliant
• More globa…

Sue Scheff: Teen Runaways

One of any parent's greatest fears is a missing child.

Each year, one million troubled teens from every social class, race and religion run away from home. Unfortunately, for American families, that number continues to rise.

Confused, pressured and highly impressionable teens follow their peers into bad choices. In most cases, runaway teenagers want to escape the rules and regulations of their family and household. Disagreements with parents leave them unhappy and frustrated to the point of rebellion. Naiveté leads them to believe they could survive outside the nest; and dreams of a life without parental guidance, rules and punishment seem ideal.

The dangers of a runaway lifestyle are obvious. Afraid and desperate, teens on the street are easy targets for robbery, rape, prostitution, drug addiction and violent crime. While the official Runaway Hotline cites nine out of ten teens return home or are returned home by the police within a month, any amount of time on the street can change…

Sue Scheff: Teaching Pre-Teens About Technology

Tangerine Times founder has written a very timely Blog about the distressing news of kids and sexting/texting. Please take the time to become an educated parent and proactive in keeping your kids safe not only online, but with their cell phones.
Source: Tangerine Times
By Myrna L.
This summer I’ve been working to expand my abilities into the video world. I was interviewed by a educational film maker about Social Media and teens (I will write more about this later). And, I’m excited to be part of a new video series about technology and kids (more on that later too). I’m also working on including a video component to my site which requires a little time and patience, both of which I’m in short supply lately due to our move. That said, I am excited to find new avenues to talk about teenagers and particularly their use of technology.

What Do YOU Know?
Frequently I get asked advice or “what do you wish you had known?” questions from parents of younger children. They are wisely looking to parent…

Sue Scheff: Teen Driving


by Anita M. Smith, Vice President, the Institute for Youth Development Source: The Institute for Youth Development

It's one of the few rites of passage in the American culture. A time of exhilaration for teens, a mixture of relief and dread for parents. And no matter how intense the anticipation or anxiety, it is an inevitable step for both parents and teens - teen driving.

While many teenagers can't wait to sit behind a steering wheel signifying more independence, many parents try to delay handing the car keys to their son or daughter. This step is fraught with emotions and can quickly become a less than positive experience for both parents and teens.

While nothing will solve all the issues or salve all the emotions related to teen driving, some common sense approaches by parents can help assure their children's safe transition through this period. Whether your children are toddlers or teens, consider the following ideas:

1.Decide on your appr…

Sue Scheff: Stop Medicine Abuse - Teen Drug Use

Source: Stop Medicine Abuse

Recent studies among middle and high school aged kids across the country show a disturbing form of substance abuse among teens: the intentional abuse of otherwise beneficial medications, both prescription (Rx) and over-the-counter (OTC), to get high.

Teens who learn a lot about the dangers of drugs from their parents are half as likely to abuse drugs.

According to the Partnership for a Drug-Free America, one in five teens reports having abused a prescription drug to get high. Where OTC medicines are concerned, data from the Partnership for a Drug-Free America indicate that one in 10 teens reports having abused OTC cough medicines to get high, and 28 percent know someone who has tried it.

The ingredient the teens are abusing in OTC cough medicines is dextromethorphan, or DXM. When used according to label directions, DXM is a safe and effective ingredient approved by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration and is found in well over 100 brand-name and store-brand o…

Sue Scheff: Teens Wrapped in the Web

By Sue Scheff
In today's society, the Internet has made its way into almost every American home. It is a well-known fact that the web is a valuable asset for research and learning. Unfortunately, it can also be a very dangerous place for teens. With social networking sites like Myspace and Friendster, chat rooms, instant messaging, and online role-playing video games, our children are at access to almost anyone. Sue Scheff, along with Parent's Universal Resource Experts™, is tackling the dangers of the web.

Keeping tabs on our teens' online habits doesn't just keep them safe from online predators. More and more parents are becoming wary of the excessive hours their teens spend surfing the web, withdrawing from family, friends and activities they used to enjoy. Internet Addiction is a devastating problem facing far too many teens and their families. While medical professionals have done limited research on the topic, more and more are recognizing this destructive behavior…

Sue Scheff: Programs through Partners in Education for At-Risk Youth

The Army National Guard’sPartners in Education program connects schools, teachers, and students with free Army National Guard educational resources, from classroom presentations to programs for at-risk youth. Classroompresentations can be requested online, and topics include:
Partners In Education (, a dynamic, interactive presentation that takes students through the steps needed to prepare for life after high school.

HUMVEE School Program (, a unique, hands-on opportunity that informs students about technical career directions while offering an up-close and personal look at the high mobility multipurpose wheeled vehicle.

YOU CAN School Program (, an award-winning program that offers more than 30 motivational presentations organized into the following categories: health and social well-being, life betterment,discovery, and disaster preparedness. It introduces students to necessary …

Sue Scheff: Michele Borba - Is Your Teen Moody or Defiant? Parenting Solutions to Help You Survive and Know When to Worry

Dr. Michele Borba, again has given us an educational and informational Blog - this time about our teens moods and how to survive them! Her new book coming out in September,The BIG Book of Parenting Solutionswill offer you literally volumes of great parenting advice!
By Michele Borba

Last year your daughter was so sweet, suddenly she has an “attitude.” Two months ago your son was your best bud, now he treats you like you’re totally “uncool.” Welcome to the world of parenting a teenager. Throw out any of those child-rearing manuals you’ve used in the past. To survive this age group and come out sane you need a whole new parenting perspective. Mark Twain offered one of most ingenious solutions: “Put them in a barrel,” he said, then and nail it shut until they turn nineteen. Only then should you let them out.” Here are a few more realistic (and legal) tips from my book, The Big Book of Parenting Solutions: 101 Answers to Your Everyday Challenges and Wildest Worries that might help you save …

Sue Scheff: Sexting, Teens and Cell Phones

I think of the title of this article says it all. Parenting today has more challenges than ever before. Being an educated parent will help you protect your teen.


By: Rina Shah, M.D. F.A.A.P
Go to Rina's Home Page
Sexting, Teens and Cell Phones

Recently, I had a 15-year-old girl in my office. We'll call her Emma. She routinely was sexting. She was sexting many young men at the same time.Never heard the term "sexting"? You are not alone.Sexting is sending sexually explicit pictures (of yourself or another) from your computer or cell phone, to another.Teens are doing it all the time.

A study done by the National Campaign to prevent teen and unwanted pregnancy shows that approximately 20% of teens send sexually explicit pictures.

There are some experts who doubt that number. But after having asked my patients over the last month, I can say that most of my teens knew someone who had been “sexting.”

Why do teens send nude or partially nude pictures of themselv…

Sue Scheff: Weekly Parenting Tips: How to Spend More Time with Our Kids

Bringing you parenting articles is part of being a Parent Advocate - and recently I discovered More for Kids website that offers great parenting advice, tips and articles. Here is one that I think now, especially during the summer, we need to read and put into action.

Source: More For Kids

Weekly Parenting Tips: How to Spend More Time with Our Kids

People may wonder if kids have gotten off track these days. You hear it all the time from the older generations. They think that kids these days simply aren’t as disciplined and respectful like kids used to be. You may have even noticed a change in your own child’s behavior and have wondered what the problem is.

Before we get too analytical about your child’s behavior—whether bad or indifferent—we have to take a quick peek at our own lifestyle. Lets ask a few questions. Do we work a lot? Do we work too much? How often are we home? How many times have we engaged our child this week?

Everyone'scircumstances are different. One thing I am not tr…