The Blog of P.U.R.E. and Sue Scheff

It stems back to "children need to have their self-esteem built up to make good decisions." Today most families are either single parent or both parents are working full time. This is not the fault of the teen, nor is it the fault of the parents. It is today's world and we must try to find the middle. Troubled teens, rebellious teens, angry teens, problem teens, difficult teens, depressed teens; unfortunately are part of the society of adolescents today. Communication is always the first to go when people get busy. We have seen this over and over again. We have also experienced it and feel that our children shut us out; this can lead to difficult teens and teens with problems. Although we are tired and exhausted, along with the stress of today's life, we need to stop and take a moment for our kids. Talk and LISTEN to them. Ask lots of questions, get to know their friends and their friend’s parents, take part in their interests, be supportive if they are having a hard...

Sue Scheff – Founder of Parents’ Universal Resource Experts and Author of Wit’s End! Advice and Resources for Saving Your Out-Of-Control Teen Offers 10 Parenting Quick Tips for 2009 1. Communication: Keeping the lines of communication of your child should be a priority with all parents. It is important to let your kids know you are always there for them no matter what the subject is. If there is a subject you are not comfortable with, please be sure your child has someone they can open up to. I believe that when kids keep things bottled up, it can be when negative behaviors can start to grow. 2. Knowing your Children’s Friends: This is critical, in my opinion. Who are your kids hanging out with? Doing their homework with? If they are spending a lot of time at a friends house, go out of your way to call the parent introduce yourself. Especially if they are spending the night at a friends house, it important to take time to call the parents or...

Are you at your wit’s end? Are you experiencing any of the following situations or feeling at a complete loss or a failure as a parent? You are not alone and by being a proactive parent you are taking the first step towards healing and bringing your family back together. Is your teen escalating out of control ? Is your teen becoming more and more defiant and disrespectful? Is your teen manipulative? Running your household? Are you hostage in your own home by your teen’s negative behavior? Is your teen angry, violent or rage outbursts? Is your teen verbally abusive? Is your teen rebellious, destructive and withdrawn? Is your teen aggressive towards others or animals? Is your teen using drugs and/or alcohol ? Does your teen belong to a gang ? Do they frequently runaway or leave home for extended periods of time? Has their appearance changed – piercing, tattoo’s, inappropriate clothing? Has your teen stopped participating in sports, clubs, church and family functions? Have they become...

As the holidays are here parents are struggling with finding constructive ways to keep their teens busy. Finding a part-time job, maybe working at a Christmas Tree stand or volunteering at a local Humane Society or visiting Nursing Homes. Parents' Universal Resource Experts has helped parents with teens for over 8+ years - and if you are at your wit's end, visit http://www.helpyourteens.com/ and hopefully we can help you help your teen!

I receive many calls from parents when their teens have runaway, left their home in a rage, and don't come back for hours, days, weeks! It is one of the scariest feelings a parent can have. Learn more about Runaway Prevention this month. Welcome to the National Runaway Switchboard Between 1.6 and 2.8 million youth run away in a year. Our mission at the National Runaway Switchboard is to help keep America’s runaway and at-risk youth safe and off the streets. Our services are provided in part through funding from Family and Youth Services Bureau in the Administration for Children and Families, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.Call 1-800-RUNAWAY if you are a teenager who is thinking of running from home, if you have a friend who has run and is looking for help, or if you are a runaway ready to go home through our Home Free program . Call if you are a teacher looking for information to pass along to your students about alternatives to running from home. Call if you care ab...

Valerie speaks with Sue Scheff about her book, Wit's End "Resources for Saving Your OUT-OF-CONTROL TEEN ," and Kathleen Duey, about her book, "My Animal Family." Also, Ramona Rubio joins to discuss her book, "The Alchemical Woman." Listen here: http://www.globaltalkradio.com/shows/callingallauthors/

With peer pressure and social influences at all-time highs, many good teens are making bad choices, placing intense emotional and financial strain on parents and families. Lack of motivation, substance abuse, negative peers and gang affiliation are just some of the common challenges facing kids today. To help address these and other issues, parent advocate Sue Scheff has announced the release of her new book, “Wit’s End: Advice and Resources for Saving Your Out-of-Control Teen.” Scheff’s book chronicles her painful journey with a struggling teenage daughter and also offers advice, resources and help to mothers and fathers forced to make tough choices regarding their children. “In the MySpace generation, kids are under more pressure than ever before,” says Scheff, author and founder of Parents’ Universal Resource Experts (P.U.R.E.), an organization that assists families with at-risk children. “This book will be an invaluable resource and allow parents to learn from my past mistakes,” sh...

Bullying continues to be a concern with parents and what their children can endure from other kids and now that school is here, it can start again. It is important to help your child understand that Bullying is not accepted and can potentially end up harming others not only emotionally - sometimes psychically. Here are some great tips for parents by Connect with Kids . “I kept trying to figure out ways to become better friends with them, like ways to fix myself so I could be better … like I wasn’t good enough… but then any time I changed anything … I changed my clothes, I learned that it wasn’t about my clothes because no matter what I did it was not good enough.” – Sarah Nadler, bullying victim Three out of four children say they’re bullied. One in ten say it happens everyday. Fourteen-year-old Alex Freed, who is tall and skinny with red hair and glasses, says it happened to him, “all day, from morning till the end; from 8 o’clock until 3 o’clock.” Alex’s bullying was not physical. In...

What a great experience to share my book, Wit's End ! and story with Lisa Hayward at ABC News in West Palm Beach!

Source: LA Times A survey on substance abuse among teens was released this morning that really lowers the boom on parents. The annual survey from the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University calls out parents for contributing to drug and alcohol use among kids ages 12 to 17. Some parents fail to monitor their children's activities, do not safeguard medications at home that can be used for abuse, and do not set good examples for their kids, the report said. Almost half of the teens surveyed -- a nationally representative sample of 1,002 teens and 312 of their parents -- said they leave the house to hang out with friends on school nights. Among those teens, half who come home after 10 p.m. said they had been drinking alcohol, smoking marijuana or doing other drugs. Just under 30% of those who come home between 8 and 10 p.m. said they had been drinking or using drugs. In contrast, only 14% of the parents said their teens leave the house to hang out with...

Are you a parent of a teenager or pre-teen that is starting to make some poor choices? They are great kids, but suddenly the decisions they are making are worrying you. Is there a new circle of friends that you are not familiar with? Are you at your wit’s end? As the founder of Parent's Universal Resource Experts we speak with parents on a daily basis that are struggling with today's youths. Are you experiencing any of the following situations or feeling at a complete loss or a failure as a parent? You are not alone and by being a proactive parent you are taking the first step towards healing and bringing your family back together. Is your teen escalating out of control ? Is your teen becoming more and more defiant and disrespectful ? Is your teen manipulative ? Running your household? Are you hostage in your own home by your teen’s negative behavior? Is your teen angry, violent or rage outbursts ? Is your teen stealing ? Is your teen verbally abusive ? Is your teen rebellious...

1. Communication: Keeping the lines of communication of your child should be a priority with all parents. It is important to let your kids know you are always there for them no matter what the subject is. If there is a subject you are not comfortable with, please be sure your child has someone they can open up to. I believe that when kids keep things bottled up, it can be when negative behaviors can start to grow. 2. Knowing your Children’s Friends: This is critical, in my opinion. Who are your kids hanging out with? Doing their homework with? If they are spending a lot of time at a friends house, go out of your way to call the parent introduce yourself. Especially if they are spending the night at a friends house, it important to take time to call the parents or meet them. This can give you a feeling of security knowing where your child is and who they are with. 3. Know your Child’s Teachers – Keep track of their attendance at school: Take time to meet each teacher and be sure they...

Too Young to Start There are almost as many reasons teens steal as there are things for teens to steal. One of the biggest reasons teens steal is peer pressure. Often, teens will steal items as a means of proving’ that they are “cool enough” to hang out with a certain group. This is especially dangerous because if your teen can be convinced to break the law for petty theft, there is a strong possibility he or she can be convinced to try other, more dangerous behaviors, like drinking or drugs. It is because of this that it is imperative you correct this behavior before it escalates to something beyond your control. Another common reason teens steal is because they want an item their peers have but they cannot afford to purchase. Teens are very peer influenced, and may feel that if they don’t have the ‘it’ sneakers or mp3 player, they’ll be considered less cool than the kids who do. If your teen cannot afford these items, they may be so desperate to fit in that they simply steal the ite...

Parenting Tips by Sue Scheff 1. Communication: Keeping the lines of communication of your child should be a priority with all parents. It is important to let your kids know you are always there for them no matter what the subject is. If there is a subject you are not comfortable with, please be sure your child has someone they can open up to. I believe that when kids keep things bottled up, it can be when negative behaviors can start to grow. 2. Knowing your Children’s Friends: This is critical, in my opinion. Who are your kids hanging out with? Doing their homework with? If they are spending a lot of time at a friends house, go out of your way to call the parent introduce yourself. Especially if they are spending the night at a friends house, it important to take time to call the parents or meet them. This can give you a feeling of security knowing where your child is and who they are with. 3. Know your Child’s Teachers – Keep track of their attendance at school: Take time to meet ...

At this time of year, it seems we are contacted by more and more parents that have an 18 year old or a 17 year old that is almost 18. If you have been struggling with your younger teen and like many of us, keep hoping and praying it will change , take a moment to think about if it doesn't. Don't miss opportunities to give your child a second chance for a bright future. Whether it is local therapy, summer motivational program or a Boarding School, as parents we do what is best for our kids. "My 18 year old is out of control and I am at my wit's end! What can I do?" Anonymous Parent . 18 - 19 year old teens can be the most difficult to address simply because they are considered adults and cannot be forced to get help. As parents, we have limited to no control. Practicing "Tough Love" is easier said than done, many parents cannot let their child reach rock bottom ? as parent's, we see our child suffering whether it is needing groceries or a roof ov...

Source: Shoulder to Shoulder Monitoring teens is an art form. Too much and teens will rebel or not learn the skills they need to function on their own. And too little monitoring can result in behaviors that spell trouble. What to do? Here are some strategies to consider for keeping track of teens. Monitoring Teens Know where our teens are - especially on evening and weekends. Let teens know that using alcohol, cigarettes or drugs is illegal and unacceptable, and that it would upset you - very much. Monitor television programs teens watch. Set rules about the music teens listen to. Know how teens are doing in school. Don't blow off parent-teacher meetings. Monitor Internet use. This is a big one. Keep computers in "public" rooms of the house. Try to eat together on a regular basis (without the TV, please). Curfews are good. Enforce them. And know the curfew laws in your community. Check in when teens come home from school. Have family routines. Insist your teen gives you...

Source: The Nemours Foundation You've lived through 2 AM feedings, toddler temper tantrums, and the but-I-don't-want-to-go-to-school-today blues. So why is the word "teenager" causing you so much anxiety? When you consider that the teen years are a period of intense growth, not only physically but morally and intellectually, it's understandable that it's a time of confusion and upheaval for many families. Despite some adults' negative perceptions about teens, they are often energetic, thoughtful, and idealistic, with a deep interest in what's fair and right. So, although it can be a period of conflict between parent and child, the teen years are also a time to help children grow into the distinct individuals they will become. Understanding the Teen Years So when, exactly, does adolescence start? The message to send your kid is: Everybody's different. There are early bloomers, late arrivals, speedy developers, and slow-but-steady growers. In other w...

As a parent advocate , this is one of the most important conversations you should have your kids today - opening the lines of communication can sometimes be difficult, but we never give up. Source: The Nemours Foundation Just as you inoculate your children against illnesses like measles, you can help "immunize" them against drug use by giving them the facts before they're in a risky situation.When kids don't feel comfortable talking to parents, they're likely to seek answers elsewhere, even if their sources are unreliable. Kids who aren't properly informed are at greater risk of engaging in unsafe behaviors and experimenting with drugs. Click here for the entire article. http://www.education.com/reference/article/Ref_Talking_Your_Drugs/ http://www.education.com/ http://www.helpyourteens.com/ http://www.witsendbook.com/

Connect with Kids is a comprehensive website that offers parenting articles, helpful tips for parents, parent forums and more. They also offer Parenting DVD's on a variety of subjects that affect our kids today. Whether it is Troubled Teens or how to raise successful kids - there is probably a DVD that can help you better understand the issues surrounding our kids today. Click here for more information and a variety of Parenting DVD's. http://www.helpyourteens.com/ http://www.witsendbook.com/ http://www.suescheff.com/

" Sue Scheff (Founder of Parents Universal Resource Experts , P.U.R.E.) and Author of Wit’s End ! Applauds the April 24th GAO Hearings on "Child Abuse and Deceptive Marketing by Residential Programs" In recent news, the United States Government Accountability Office (GAO) has conducted a study revealing concerns about abuse and deaths in certain programs for struggling teens as well as deceptive trade practices of referral agencies within this industry labeled, teen-help. At P.U.R.E. we are deeply touched by the publicized reports, which found thousands of cases involving abuse and even death at facilities licensed to help troubled teens. It is disturbing to hear about marketing arms (referral agencies) that prey upon the desperate parent. When I was a parent at my wit’s end, I became prey for a referral agency that made many false promises and my daughter suffered the consequences. This reality hit home with my daughter and myself which inspired me to create Parents...