Showing posts from February, 2011

Parent Help with Struggling Teens: Good Kids, Bad Choices

Parents of at-risk teens have many common thoughts, here are some of them:

My daughter is so smart, she is highly intelligent.
My son is extremely handsome, very athletic and always had lots of friends.
My daughter is beautiful, was the captain of her cheerleading team etc....
My son has an IQ of 170, yet is failing.
My daughter wants to drop out of high school.
My son wants to get his GED and is not attending school.
My daughter made the varsity team and yet dropped out.
My son was swim captain and now was asked to leave the team. (He was caught with pot, but said it was his friends.
My daughter smokes pot, but it is only recreational.
My son likes to drink beer, but it isn't all the time.

Excuses for parents:

It is the friends he/she is hanging with.
The teacher doesn't like my son/daughter.
The school has zero tolerance.
His father isn't around enough.
The coach expects too much.
If it wasn't for this one neighbor, we wouldn't have these issues.

Okay, these lists …

Teen Drinking: A Growing Concern for Parents

A modest meeting amongst friends on campus can be enhanced immeasurably with the introduction of a fun, buzz-inducing drinking game. Of course, drinking in general is associated with the college experience, in which young adults assert their independence by going buck wild. Such behavior usually comes with the lack of a true understanding of the consequences of alcohol, and thus reckless behavior — albeit fun behavior — ensues. Consequently, some drinking games can turn a lively shindig into a deadly or at least vomit-inducing debacle.

Here are a few to avoid if you value the function of your liver (or eyeball).
Vodka Eyeballing: Originating in the UK, the Vodka Eyeballing craze has spread across the Atlantic Ocean thanks to YouTube, and now it's catching on with numbskull American teens and college students. Unlike other drinking games, the feared repercussion isn't alcohol poisoning; it's the potential of losing eyesight. Vodka eyeballers test their eyeball'…

Scared Straight Programs: Do They Really Work?

It never ceases to amaze me that parents are still asking for boot camps or scared straight programs.  Although they may make an initial effect on your teen, it is rarely, if ever, long lasting.  They are usually considered a band-aid to a wound that will soon be re-opened.

Many teens that are acting out in a negative way, are usually crying out for help.  Lack of self-esteem, negative peer group and simply feel like they are not important to anyone.

Boot camps and scared straight programs are about breaking your child down - aren't they already there?  In many cases these types of programs can build more anger and resentment which is usually targeted at the parent that sent them there.

Finding a program that helps determine where these negative impulses are coming from and helping your teen work through them can be the best way to get back on a positive road.

Are you ready to get your teen the help they may need?  Visit for resources.

Teens Escalating Out-of-Control: When is enough - ENOUGH?

Today I was on In Session with Ryan Smith.

An interesting segment about troubled teens and boot camps. It is also a disturbing trial that is almost incomprehensible. 

As a young man is being charged with hiring a hit-man to kill his parents, part of his defense is the horrible time he spent in a specialty program.  This program was actually under the same umbrella of schools and programs that my own daughter attended.

Yes, the program in our experience, was extremely abusive - both physically and emotionally.  Did it create someone to actually kill their parents?  I haven't heard of that yet.  I will share with you these types of stories can sometimes deter parents from getting their teens help.

P.U.R.E. was created to help educate parents on searching and investigating schools and programs for your teen's individual needs.  We warn you to use caution of slick marketing scams - fancy websites and toll free numbers going all over the place.

When you realize you are losing contr…

Second Semester and My Teen is Failing!

As second semester is progressing, and faster than we realize, our High School teenagers are not recognizing how important these years are to getting into a good college or university.

It is a fact, not all kids are designed to go to college, some are very good at vocational trades, and that is a great direction too - as long as they have a direction.

However if you see that your once A-B student is barely getting C's and D's it is time to find out what is going on.

Talk to your teenTalk to his/her guidance counselorTalk to his/her teachersWho are your teen's friends now? Are they also failing?What has changed?Why are they spiraling to a destructive level?This list could go on forever, but at the end of the day, it is about getting your teen back on track.  Especially if you have a 16-17 year old, you have limited time to get them back on the positive road.

Have you tried therapy, which in many cases can lead to a dead end since your teen doesn't seem to see the issue -…

Teens: Getting them Motivated

"My teenager is brilliant!  Highly intelligent, has the potential to make all A's but is barely bringing home C's!  Help!"

This is a common complaint we hear about from many of today's parents.  Teens do not recognize the importance of education and what it means to their future.  As a matter of fact, we are seeing more adults going back for a higher education than ever before.  Why?  It is simple- education is the key to your financial future.  Now we need to get our teenagers to understand this.

It is up to parents to set boundaries and set the example.  We are not saying that teens are not allowed to have a social life, of course they are.  We need them to find the balance.

Here are some great tips from Parents and Kids:
Start early on as possible as you can, set up reasonable goals, begin with small tasks and give them time to improve. For example, have the child state the goal, the grade on their upcoming report card for their classes, math, English, scienc…