Sue Scheff: 10 Toughest Questions Kids Ask

Guest Blogger, Phillip Lopez, as written an article that many parents will find extremely helpful.  Raising kids and teens today is challenging.  Figuring out how to answer those tough and sensitive questions can be scary and stressful to parents. Phillip Lopez writes for Christian Colleges and Universities.

10 Toughest Questions Kids Ask
By: Phillip Lopez

If you’re a parent, you’ve undoubtedly discovered that raising children is the most difficult task you’ve ever undertaken. It’s your responsibility to shape their impressionable minds – whether or not they grow up to become productive members of society and successful individuals supposedly hinges on your every move. So go figure they ask the most difficult questions early in the parenting process, when they’re most curious and you’re most clueless. Below are a handful of those questions that make parents cringe.

1. How are babies made?
   Every parent has inevitably been asked this question in some variation. Most are left wondering how such a thought had entered their child’s mind, and who they should tongue-lash for putting it there. But now that it’s on the table, you have to explain it in terms that are least explicit. “The birds and the bees” talk has long been a go-to option, or you can come up with your own story. Or better yet, defer to your spouse.
2. Why do boys have [this] and girls have [that]?
   You get the idea. If they happen to ask this question along with question No. 1, they probably know more than they’re leading on. If they ask those questions when they’re 14-years-old, you’ve got bigger problems on your hands.
3. Where do people go when they die?
   If you’re a Christian, the answer seems simple enough: Heaven. But explaining what Heaven entails and what it takes to get there can take an eternity. Explaining any religion’s afterlife to a three, four or five-year-old is akin to describing quantum physics to a football player – it’s a lost cause. If you don’t happen to belief in an afterlife, well, your answer is easy.
4. Am I going to die someday?
   This question is a bit underrated and often unexpected. Your child may or may not realize they are going to die when they pose question No. 3. If they do, break the news gently. Many kids have spent sleepless nights pondering their fate, and you know that when your kid is sleepless, you’re sleepless.
5. Why?
   “Why?” usually pertains to anything and everything, and the question is typically asked a bazillion times through ages three and four. The best part about parenting a young kid is they don’t realize that you’re pretty much clueless about everything, so almost any answer will suffice as long as you don’t warp their perception of reality.
6. Can I come?
   Saying “no” is difficult in itself, but it’s especially difficult when they look up at you with their big teary eyes. No parent wants to hurt their child’s feelings, but is it really necessary to bring the little one with you to your physical examination? Do you think your coworkers can maintain their productivity while your child plays tag with their imaginary friend around your office? Sometimes tough love is the only solution.
7. Why does my brother/sister hate me?
   Parenting would be a whole lot easier if you knew how to make your kids get along. Unfortunately, it’s usually beyond your control. The only way to answer this question is by explaining the unconditional love that exists between siblings. Afterward, pray they’ll mature as they get older so that you won’t have to deal with a lifetime of bickering and petty feuds.
8. Why are we moving?
   Moving is never fun. Breaking the news to your kid can be worse than the time consuming and backbreaking packing and unpacking. No explanation alleviates the pain that comes with leaving their friends behind. All you can do is make the move as easy on them as possible.
9. Why did he/she call me that?
   Kids are cruel. If they don’t like someone, they make it known. They live in a world that’s starkly different from the passive-aggressive adult world. Avoid the urge to indirectly insult their parents under your breath the next time you see them, and tell your kid to just ignore the meanie.
10. Why wasn’t I invited to that party?
    It’s possible that the parents who are hosting the party simply didn’t have enough money or resources to invite an additional kid. This explanation works best in most cases – true or not. But if your child realizes that it’s because they simply aren’t liked, explain how not inviting them made the unhappy kid feel better about him or herself. The same answer could work for No. 9. Two birds with one stone. Maybe parenting isn’t so difficult.